Dude... What Are You Doing?

First Gear... I pull out of the garage onto a bumpy dirt road. Second Gear... and I am cruising past Guards and Vendors and young girls carrying buckets of water from the neighborhood pump on their head. Third Gear... I reach the Rue.

Stop lights? Forget it
Lanes? Forget it
Passing on the left? Forget it
Drivers License? Forget it

Forget everything you know about driving. (Hey Ohio County PD! I'm still sore about that $145 ticket!)

New Rules:
1. The bigger vehicle has the right away. Always. Unless... there are more motos packed together than the size of the vehicle.
2. Pass where ever there is an empty spot (i.e. sidewalk, left, right, curb, between cars/trucks motos that are parked)
3. For heaven sake.. Don't Stop. The expectation is that you will keep going. If you stop - everyone gets confused.
4. Stay away from Taxis. They are your worst nightmare. They break all the rules.
5. Use your horn liberally. The horn lets people know things like... I'm passing you... or I'm selling something.. or I'm a Taxi.. or The light is working and its green.. or Hello!
6. Don't turn on your headlight until well after dark... and even then consider if you should save it for later.
7. Smile at the Military/Police and keep driving.
8. Motos and sand/water don't mix.
9. Mirrors are for looking at yourself. Whats behind you is that guys problem.

As I cruise around the Boulevard Circulaire on my Italian made - African painted Vespa at approximatley... I don't know because my odometer doesn't work, I notice people coming at me from both sides as cars blatantly inch out or pull out into oncoming traffic and African print shirts blow past me at phenomenal speeds and through the lens of my Ray Bans it all just seems like stop action film. And I find myself repeating the mantra Dude... What are you doing? And I notice that I am speaking to myself as often as I am someone one else.